Coming out grey

I used to live in a dichotomous world. Men vs. Women. Straight vs. Gay. Gay vs. Trans. Feminine vs. Masculine. I was attached to these various dichotomies. There was no middle ground, and if you suggested there was such a thing, such a grey area… you’d get cut son!

Over time my eyes have been opened. Each of those expressions of our human selves occur on a sliding scale. Some women are more masculine than some men. It doesn’t necessarily have to mean that they are gay or they hate themselves. Some men are heterosexual lesbian identified men. If that is how they choose to identify, then HURRAH! They’ll find someone to love them, live productive lives and hopefully be able to walk the streets without getting assaulted.

Once the “great dividers” in my head cleared, the World became a lot easier to deal with. Puzzling over gay men in drag who love their bodies became a thing of the past. Agonizing over the very feminine women who preferred other feminine women was no longer an affront to me. I still wish that masculine women would hoist their pants over their underwear, but please, have as many pockets on it as you wish, swagger down the street and grab whatever you have in your crotch (no scratching though!).

I love the diversity that life is. It blesses me to know that wherever I am in the scale, whichever scale, I’m okay.

I’m coming out somewhere in the middle of all the stuff.


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